


No Place for A Hero

by OneHundredSuns



Series: Battle Scars [3]
Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood, Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Boys Kissing, Canon - Movie, Demons, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fighting, Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, Hidden Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Original Character(s), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, Sexual Content, Vampires, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-05
Updated: 2015-03-28
Packaged: 2018-03-05 11:45:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3118973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneHundredSuns/pseuds/OneHundredSuns
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Magnus and Alec, navigating their relationship is hard enough without outside forces trying to tear them a part. Quite literally in some cases.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy part three. :) Please kudo and comment, and let me know what you think!

Chapter One

Magnus didn’t like to dwell on the past even though it was something he never really let himself forget and only talked about it with those he trusted with complete abandon. Alec Lightwood was now one of those people but there were things about Magnus that he just didn’t need to know. Things that were horrible and darkened Magnus’ good memories about living forever no matter how hard he tried to make them not to. For all of the life and happiness he’d seen and experienced, there was also _so_ much death. People dying in his arms as he watched the last bit of light leave their eyes. Countless battles and battlefields soaked red with blood; the faces of people he knew and cherished suffering at the hands of others simply because they were different. Simply because they’d wanted _more_.

It was funny because while he was dating a Shadowhunter he didn’t exactly spend a lot of time thinking about what that meant. Maybe it was because Alec wasn’t a traditional Shadowhunter. Oh he was brave and selfless and an amazing warrior, but he wasn’t a stuck up snob with his nose in the air when it came to Downworlders. Magnus could honestly say Alec had never looked at him differently because he was a warlock. Had never shunned him or turned away from him because of his demon blood. Even now with how some of the vampires had treated him he tried to be as civil as he could with Simon, realizing nothing that had happened to the former mundane was his fault. And that although he had fangs he was still the same person.

But with Camille back in town and supposedly making a play for the New York vampires, Magnus couldn’t help but reflect on the instances in his life that had helped shaped the person he was now. Especially where she was concerned. There were gaps—much needed gaps—when it came to her but once upon a time he had loved her. Thought the world of her. Now he frowned just thinking about her. She hadn’t shown up again since that night but just knowing she was so close annoyed him…probably because he knew how much it annoyed Alec.

He didn’t believe for one millisecond that she wanted him back but Camille was a spoilt creature; she’d gladly try to tempt him if it meant winning over someone else. She was very Katherine in _Cruel Intentions_ that way. Besides having a warlock in her pocket would go a long way to making herself the Queen Vampire bee again. Magnus was happy that the current vampire leader Raphael Santiago wasn’t just stepping down and handing over the reins. Yes he made fun of Magnus on several occasions but he was fair and most of all not a crazy bitch.

Magnus felt bad that Simon had to be mixed up in any of that drama. It was a small mercy that Raphael was his sire and he avoided spending any time with the vampires when he could, but he also couldn’t ignore a summons. He would be connected to them forever and as long as Camille was interested in him for _whatever reason_ he would have no peace. Yet he was safer than most thanks to his ties to the Shadowhunters.

Lounging on his couch and staring up at the ceiling, Magnus felt a familiar itch underneath his skin. He’d taken the night off from his work of researching and rendering services to those that sought him out to just be lazy, yet now he sort of yearned for the opposite. Keeping busy kept his mind too active to think about depressing thoughts. When he was working on something for someone he put his all into it so that they got their monies worth and hopefully told their friends so that he’d get more business. Sure he could just conjure up money but working kept him sharp.

He glanced to the clock and made a face; Alec wouldn’t be showing up—if he managed at all—until midnight at the earliest. There were still bad guys to take care of after all. Not to mention while Magnus figured the young Shadowhunter’s friends knew _something_ was going on between them, Alec continued to lie or at most say they were just friends. Magnus allowed it because it honestly didn’t bother him though he did wonder when Alec would come clean. However he felt there was time for that later; Alec wasn’t even eighteen yet.

Grinning a little, he sat up and grabbed his cell phone off the table. Chairman Meow eyed him lazily as his tail swished back and forth, his big ears pitched high as if he was interested in whatever conversation his owner/daddy was about to have.

Magnus dialed a number he knew from memory and waited as the line rung, smiling when a soft voice picked up on the tenth ring. “Hello?”

“Catarina my lovely. How are you?”

“Busy.” She replied which was usually her reply whenever he tried to get a hold of her. “Is something wrong?”

He sighed. “No nothing is wrong unless you count my impending boredom. I thought I would call to make sure you are still in once piece. And I suppose to check on Clary’s mother.”

Catarina Loss like Magnus was a warlock but she spent most of her time healing the sick. Day in and day out she worked to save lives, using her magic to heal and ease the pain of those too far gone. Like most warlocks she had a mark branding her as so but to the extreme; gorgeous blue skin that covered her all over much like Mystique from the movies. Magnus found her beautiful but since they both understood most mundanes wouldn’t, she used a glamour to make herself to look normal. Currently she was a nurse at the same hospital that housed Clary’s mother.

Catarina hummed. “I can’t help your boredom but I can tell you Clary’s mother is the same. Stable. The doctor’s have no idea how to treat her and we both know no modern medicine will help her. I tried to heal her but nothing happened.”

He’d figured as much. “Must have been a very powerful potion. Any thoughts?”

His friend yawned. “I think neither of us have what is needed to help her.”

The image of something formed in Magnus’ mind and he scribbled it down as a note so that he wouldn’t forget it. “I’ll look into it. I think I know where it is.” Pause. “So, how are you really?”

She chuckled. “I’m fine but thank you for asking. I’m actually on a break otherwise I’d have hung up by now.”

 _Oh don’t I know it._ “Lucky me then! We can gossip like schoolgirls about our exciting lives.”

“Is this your way of saying you want to talk about that Shadowhunter you are apparently seeing?” She inquired lightly. “I mean I’ve heard rumors—Ragnor said Raphael said there was an incident—but you know I don’t put much stock into such things. I’m guessing it’s all true?”

“Ragnor and Raphael should just get married already.” He grumbled. “But yes I am seeing a Shadowhunter. I know it sounds crazy but it happened kind of fast. He’s…sweet.”

“Sweet?” Her voice was laced with amusement. “Well that’s good. I didn’t know Lightwoods _could_ be sweet.”

A dark memory sliced through Magnus’ mind but he pushed it away. “Well Alec is. He’s nothing like his parents, Catarina. I mean they’re fair I guess, at least fairer than most but he’s different. He _sees_ us. He sees me.”

There was silence and then, “Careful Magnus. You sound smitten and the last non human person you were smitten with used you up and threw you away.”

Magnus cringed. “Speaking of which, Camille is back in town and pretending to give a damn what I do.”

Catarina’s reply was immediate. “Stay away from her. You’re happy and making moon eyes at a new love. Don’t let her ruin it with her general horribleness.”

He snickered. “I don’t plan to _let_ her ruin anything. You know it was—it was odd seeing her again. I thought I would feel something but there was nothing there. I’m glad that is the case.”

“Me too.” Catarina said softly. “And if this Lightwood Shadowhunter makes you happy then that is all that matters. But be careful. Not everyone will be as understanding about it as I am.”

“I know.” Magnus rubbed at his eyes. “That’s why we’re not officially out yet on either side. I’m not sure any of his friends know and the only reason Raphael knows is because of the whole…kidnapping thing. Camille knows because she showed up while he was here but I don’t think she is going to say anything. Where would the fun be if she can’t be hands on and terrible?”

“Don’t focus on her at all.” A voice echoed over the loudspeaker and Catarina cleared her throat. “However my break is almost over and I _do_ want to re-caffeinate before I get back to work. It was nice talking to you Magnus. Maybe one day soon I’ll get to meet your Shadowhunter.”

The line clicked in his ear before he got the chance to say goodbye but it was to be expected. Catarina took her job very seriously, sometimes too seriously but he supposed it wasn’t his place to say so. She was doing what she loved and saving lives, how could someone find fault in that?

Hanging up, he put his cell back on the table and lay down. The Chairman took this as an invitation to jump onto his chest and stretch out, his tiny paw booping Magnus on the nose to get his attention. Magnus smirked but delivered the petting he was being asked for. His cat snuggled down and started to purr loudly without a care in the world.

Catarina wasn’t wrong in her insinuations about the Lightwoods. Magnus knew them, how could he not really with how long he’d been alive and been in New York. He knew of their past and the things they were involved in but he’d never bring that up to Alec. He’d also never hold their unforgivable past misdeeds against him. Yet it was slightly amusing to think about how they once viewed Downworlders to now and what their eldest son was currently doing with one.

He wondered if they would remember him if they met again. Not because he was the High Warlock of Brooklyn but because of things that happened in the late eighties/early nineties. Things they could never take back. Things they _should_ be ashamed of. What would they say if they knew about him and Alec? What would they _do_?

_Have I been ignoring how dangerous our relationship could be for both of us? I can take care of myself. Can Alec if he needed to against the Clave?_

Magnus knew how heavy handed the Clave could be when it came to doling out what they considered justice for a punishable offence. To them anything not in accordance with their laws could be punished in the strictest way possible, even falling in love with who they saw as the wrong person.

Fleetingly he thought about breaking up with Alec for his own good but decided he couldn’t take that decision away from him. Being in a relationship was a two person job and so far they were both working hard to make it work. Alec knew the risks otherwise he wouldn’t be hiding the way he was. Still it probably wouldn’t hurt to touch base with him about Clave shit. If it came to it he would totally kidnap Alec to the Bahamas to keep him safe from them.

Kissing his kitty on the head, he gently moved him onto the sofa and got up to go over to his desk. There he opened a few of his thick books and started to read, skipping between Greek and Archaic Latin, searching for the last known locations of what he needed that could _possibly_ help Clary’s mother. He hadn’t really spoken to Clary one on one for a while now because she was so preoccupied with learning about her new life. No doubt it was a lot to take in but he was willing to help if she asked.

In moderation of course… Try as he might however he couldn’t stop seeing her as that scrappy little ginger that tried to eat one of his candles so many years ago. Quite happily at that.

And he supposed in some odd way Jocelyn was now a friend. He wanted to help her because it was clear that a vicious darkness was rising and it would be all hands on deck when that happened. Even a retired Shadowhunter was better than nothing.

By the time keys jingled in his front door it was one am and Magnus’ eyes were watering from all of the reading he’d been doing. He couldn’t truthfully say that he was closer to his _prize_ but he had a pretty good idea of where it was now, which was a problem in and of itself. This was something even he couldn’t just conjure out of thin air. Glancing up, he smiled as Alec made his way inside, cheeks flushed and in complete gear. Magnus snapped the books closed and yawned, stretching his arms high over his head and listening to his bones crack.

“Hello beautiful.” He said tiredly. “How was work?”

Alec grinned and went about removing his weapons, putting them in a neat little pile on the side of the couch before giving the Chairman a scratch behind his ears. “The usual I suppose though remind me not to listen to Jace if he says something else is extinct.” He stepped into the light and Magnus noticed the long slash on his cheek and the dried blood.

He was up seconds later and caressing the Shadowhunter’s face, turning it so that he could get a better look at the wound. “Are you alright? What did this?”

“Some dragon demon thing.” Alec replied easily. “And yeah I’m fine. Just kinda tired and in serious need of a shower. I smell like the sewers.”

That was true but Magnus ignored it. “Do you want me to heal you?”

Alec yawned. “No I’ll use a rune after my shower.” His eyes were sleepy but bright and he looked well for someone that had obviously tangled with a pretty violent demon.

Magnus arched a brow. “Why do you look so happy right now? You’re bruised and bleeding and smell a little like poop.”

Blushing, Alec wet his lips. “Because I’m here with you. I—I told the others that I wanted to check on you and since it was late that they shouldn’t wait up. So…I can spend the night if I leave early tomorrow morning if you want me to. Spend the night I mean…”

And just like that Magnus felt his heart melt inside of his chest. He dropped his head forward to rest his forehead against Alec’s. “Of course I want you to. Please feel free to crawl into bed with me any time you want whether I am awake or not.” A beat. “Why don’t you go get a shower and I’ll lock up. Are you hungry? I could get you a snack first.”

Alec smiled. “No I’m okay.” He squeezed Magnus’ wrist and then slowly made his way towards the master bedroom and bathroom.

Magnus dragged a hand through his black hair, making it messier than it already was. _How_ was he in so deep already? Was it because Alec was just _that_ damn amazing or was he just _that_ starved for love after so many years? _Perhaps it’s a mixture of both but that’s okay. You know it’s okay._

Some people thought they didn’t deserve to be happy but he wasn’t one of them. He _wanted_ to be happy but it was sort of ephemeral in the long run because he was immortal. Whatever happiness he managed to find—in a mortal at least—always came to an end. They always ended up leaving either by walking away or in death. Sometimes he wished he could follow when it came to the latter. Sometimes he wished he could grow old and faded away; follow them into the hopefully bright light so that they could be young and beautiful forever.

He had told Alec that in their world, all things were possible…Wonderful and terrible things…

Caught by a big yawn, he shook his head and made sure the front door was locked. Not that anyone would be stupid enough to try to rob him but better safe than sorry. Turning out all of the lights except for one of those electric candles that set in the windowsill, he padded into his bedroom and threw himself onto the bed. Chairman Meow followed a moment later, flopping across the foot of the bed with shifty eyes, as if he were planning something deviously. And he probably was.

The bathroom door opened and Alec walked out dry and dressed in a soft blue t-shirt and gray pajamas bottoms. He clicked off the light and made the trek to the bed, crawling under the covers with a little grin. “I feel so much better now.”

Magnus rolled to face him. “I’m glad.” The cut on his cheek was gone, not even a scar left behind and the warlock couldn’t resist reaching out to trace where it had once been. “You look all refreshed too.”

Alec flipped onto his back and gazed up at the ceiling. “I washed the sewer off me. Do I smell better?”

Magnus snorted. “Duh.” Wiggling his brows, he shifted closer and snuffled at his boyfriend’s neck like an eager puppy looking for treats. “Oh yeah much better. I could live here in this spot for a while.”

Laughing, Alec slipped an arm around his waist and held him close. “I’d let you if I could. Though I’m not sure how things like eating and going to the bathroom would work out.”

“I’d use magic for all of those things.” Magnus replied, licking at his runes. “We’d basically never leave this bed though. That would put a damper on my party planning but I’d find a way around it.”

“You can be such a dork sometimes.” The Shadowhunter mused. “It makes me forget how old you really are.”

“Age is just a number…unless you wanna buy beer and cigarettes.” Magnus shrugged and propped his head up with his hand. “Between the two of us you are probably more mature.”

Alec stared at him with a _yeah right_ expression. “I…might be more responsible because I am a Shadowhunter but I wouldn’t equate that with maturity. In everyday life I hardly know what I’m doing.” He pouted dramatically. “And I’ll be eighteen soon so I’ll be able to attend Clave business which I am kinda excited about. Because I’m a nerd like that.”

The warlock smoothed his thumb across Alec’s lips. “I think it’s cute. You take what you do seriously and you should. More Shadowhunters should be like you.”

“So far in the closet they could wear all of their clothes at once?”

“Heh _no_. Brave, intelligent and most importantly sincere. You have no idea what it means to have you look at me like I’m a person with feelings instead of just…a warlock.”

Frowning, Alec looked at him as if he could never imagine thinking anything differently. “ _Of course_ you’re a person. I—I know the difference between good Downworlders and bad. Luke and his pack are good. Hell I know not _all_ vampires are bad. For some reason I just keep running into the assholes.”

Magnus kissed him softly. “Still, you’re a rare creature Alexander Lightwood.”

Searching his face, Alec bit his bottom lip. “What’s wrong? Does this have anything to do with what you were reading when I came in?”

He decided to curve the truth a little. “Actually no. Well…I’m trying to find something that would help Clary’s mom wake up but so far nothing is jumping out at me. I don’t like not having the answers.” Slipping down on the mattress, he rested his head to Alec’s chest. “I wouldn’t say anything is wrong. You know things haven’t always been good between the Nephilim and Downworlders. Sometimes I remember how bad it used to be.”

Alec dragged his slender fingers through Magnus’ hair. “I’m sorry. I know the history—I don’t ever see it being that bad again. We have a truce with Downworlders.”

Neither of them said directly _what_ had been so bad and that was perfectly fine with Magnus. All of that was mixed up in a conversation he never wanted to have. And yet… “I doubt Valentine wants the cup to invite us all to a tea party.”

“Yeah but the Clave is taking his resurrection very seriously so that past mistakes cannot be repeated. Besides even if he swore on Clary’s life he was a better person no one would believe him.” Pause. “I hate him on principle for what he’s putting Jace through by proxy. How do you get over finding out that your maybe father is a mass murdering psychopath?”

 _You don’t._ “Your fair Wayland will survive. It seems to be one of the things he does best.”

“You wouldn’t think it if you saw how he threw himself into fights sometime.” He could hear the eye roll in Alec’s voice. “Or took reckless chances for no reason. Sometimes I just want to punch him in the face.”

“I really, really believe that.” Magnus teased. “So wait, are you telling me you are completely over your crush on him?”

Alec sputtered. “I—there wasn’t—what? I didn’t have a _crush_ on him.” Face red, he turned away. “I thought I was in love with him.”

Smiling inwardly, Magnus walked his fingers across Alec’s tight stomach. “And you have since realized you’re not?”

Alec nodded. “He was safe so…” Digging the heel of his palm into his eye, he sighed. “Anyway I should get some sleep if I’m gonna sneak out of here at the crack of dawn. I guess I don’t have to. They know I’m crashing here though I said on the couch but I don’t wanna press my luck.”

Humming and deciding not to press, Magnus waved a hand and the lights clicked out. One day Alec would be able to say what he hoped was in his heart. “Goodnight Alec.”

Alec kissed his forehead. “Goodnight Magnus.”

*

The _Institute_ was a magnificent structure of marble and stone that stretched towards the sky much like the wings of an angel, which was aptly appropriate considering what went on within its hallowed halls. That it was sanctuary to the children of angels; a home and a place for them to better themselves. Still Alec found it drafty and slightly dull after spending time at Magnus’ apartment. His room—which he’d always thought of as comfortable—was now more Spartan than anything else. It lacked all of the warmth and spice that Magnus filled all of his rooms with. If it wasn’t for the sandalwood smell he’d probably want to move to another one.

After leaving Magnus asleep with his face pressed into a pillow, Alec had made his way home to find everyone still in bed. And that was where he’d gone to get a few more hours. Idly he wondered what it would be like to not have to be so sneaky. To spend weeks or months at Magnus’ without anyone giving a shit. Well anyone besides Jace or Isabelle of course.

Would that day ever come?

He was standing in the library and staring out of a window at the city, thinking about future lazy mornings he wished he could have when the door opened and Jace made his way inside. He moved easily and immediately owned the room, strolling over to the long wooden table to sit down and put his feet up on it. There was a charming sort of air about Jace even when he was being a jerk. Maybe it was the confidence he projected or how he gave you his full attention when he was talking to you. Alec had never been able to put his finger on it but that combined with his looks, made for a dangerous combination that he hadn’t been able to resist.

Though now he realized his feelings while genuine were also a smokescreen. Wanting Jace was safe because he knew—deep down—Jace would never want him back. He could happily pine for him for the rest of their lives and never have to deal with the real issues at hand.

And then came Magnus Bane.

Alec licked his lips and turned to give Jace his full attention even though he wasn’t saying anything, just sitting and playing with a few loose pieces of paper. “I don’t think I’ve ever known you to be this quiet.”

Jace shrugged. “You looked as if you were thinking about something important. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

Alec chuckled. “Since when?” He sat down across from his _parabatai._

“Since…you actually look happy.” Jace began to fold the paper into a shape. “Besides there is nothing exciting going on in my life right now. Just a newfound maybe sister, her once upon a time mundane friend that’s now a vampire and a crazy serial killer father. I’ve had fever dreams more interesting.”

“I know this can’t be easy for you. None of it.” Alec whispered. “But you’re not alone. You should talk about the things that bother you.”

His friend arched a brow. “Like _you_ do?” When Alec didn’t reply, he exhaled deeply. “There is nothing to talk about. Valentine has been absent for a while now and while it should make me happy, it actually has the opposite effect. He’s _planning_ something and whatever it is, we won’t like it.”

“So what do you suggest we do? Go looking for him?”

“I thought about it but figured Isabelle would beat me if I tried. But maybe we should go to Idris.”

“Why? I’m sure they know what happened here.”

“Yes but they probably have more information on everything. And maybe they know what happened to Hodge since he’s mysteriously disappeared.”

“He—”

“I know what he did. Now I want to know _why_.”

Idris was the original home country to all Shadowhunters, given to them by the Angel Raziel so that they could go about their business without prying mundane eyes. There was only one city—Alicante, the capital—that was surrounded by beautiful mountains. Alicante was where official Clave business was held and where the Laws were made. Alec vaguely remembered it before he’d been sent to New York to continue his Shadowhunter training with Isabelle and Jace. He remembered it being beautiful with glimmering towers and streets that filled with snow in the winter. It was sort of like something you would see on television—that was how he would describe it to a mundane or Clary heh. Some old world snapshot where the technologies of today had no place, where you expected people to dress differently and speak differently.

Although he was more or less happy in New York he’d always figured he’d return to Alicante someday because a part of him longed for it. He wasn’t exactly sure why if he were being honest however.

Scratching his cheek, he shifted in his chair and put both arms on the table. “You should talk to Isabelle about this since it concerns her as well. And…Clary. I highly doubt she’ll let you go without her. Then maybe try to contact my parents.”

Jace combed long fingers through his messy blonde hair. “One thing at a time I suppose. I’ll send a message to your mother and see what she has to say. Then if that doesn’t blow up in my face I’ll talk to Isabelle and Clary. _If_ going to Idris works we’ll need someone to create a portal for us. Do you think Magnus would do it?”

 _I’m pretty sure he would._ “Yes… Maybe even for a reduced fee.”

Snickering, Jace presented the piece of paper that was now a little swan. “I’m surprised no one from the Clave has wanted to talk to Clary or me considering everything that has happened. Talk or interrogate us with all manner of implements to make sure we’re not lying or secretly in league with Valentine.”

“They are probably doing that with Hodge.” Alec replied lowly. “The most we can hope for is that _he_ is not lying about your involvement.”

“Sometimes I can’t believe this is happening. That I’m not a Wayland but a Morgenstern. I’d rather not exist.”

“Don’t say that! If anyone judges you for the choices _he_ made, then they’re stupid. That is an extremely ignorant way to be.”

“That’s the _Clave_. Right and wrong have never mattered much if it interferes with their own set of rules and morality.”

“Maybe they’ll surprise us. Sometimes they do actually listen to reason. And you know mom and dad will hear you out no matter what.”

Naturally Jace thought the opposite. “We’ll see.”

Alec couldn’t imagine what Jace was going through but he wished there was something he could do to help. “Jace—”

Jace waved a hand. “So how _is_ Magnus by the way? You said you wanted to check on him last night? Was there a reason why?”

Allowing the subject change, the Shadowhunter rubbed the back of his neck. “No—I—no. It’s just he um—well he takes contracts for a lot of people that want demons summoned and you never know when something could go wrong. He’s strong but everyone makes mistakes.”

The blonde hummed thoughtfully. “True. Though I doubt he got to be High Warlock of Brooklyn by being rash and impulsive. Besides those are _my_ best traits.”

Alec grinned. “Going up against a coven of vampires to help us was a bit impulsive.” _Especially considering his ties to one…_ “They could retaliate.”

His _parabatai_ snorted. “Those vampires were obviously too dumb to live. The ones we fought in the hotel looked sickly anyway. Breaking the Accords was probably something they relished.”

Alec opened his mouth to answer when the library door opened and Clary stepped inside, bare arms dotted with just a few runes. The basics as it were. She gave a soft smile to both of them and drifted closer, wearing clothes that were her own instead of borrowed ones from Isabelle. They made her look every bit the mundane he’d previously thought she was but that was okay.

“I’m gonna go talk to Isabelle.” Jace stood and left the room but he did give his _sister_ a reassuring smile, not that it was.

Clary frowned after him. “Did I interrupt anything?”

Alec shook his head. “Not really. Jace is just…having a crisis of identity which I am sure you can relate to.”

She made a face. “Yeah.” Pulling at the ends of her hair, she sighed. “I miss the days when the most important thing I had to worry about was being late to meet Simon for some poetry slam. They were boring but at least my mom was okay.”

While he wasn’t sure he should say anything, he felt compelled to give her a dash of hope. After all he didn’t know how he would react if his parents ever went missing. “Magnus is trying to find something to help her. I don’t know if he will but…he’s looking.”

Her tiny face lit up. “Really? That’s great! I—I mean I get it’s probably seriously complicated but just knowing _someone_ is doing _something_ …” She blinked rapidly. “I was so mad at her the day she was taken. I said terrible things. I just wish she had told me the truth. Then maybe I wouldn’t feel so helpless.”

He stared at her. “I don’t think knowing truth would have stopped what happened. These things have a way of running their course no matter what. At least now you know what’s going on and can join in the fight.”

“Right.” Clary scuffed at the floor. “So um, since Jace is apparently doing something mysterious I was wondering if maybe you wanted to train with me. I promise not to hit you in the face this time.”

Arching a brow, Alec decided why not. “Okay. But I think we’ve moved beyond wooden weapons. How about we use seraph blades this time?”

She blinked. “Oh okay. Just—if I cut or stab you please know it’s not personal.”

Alec laughed as he stood. “You know what? I can honestly echo the same.”


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Stretched out on his bed in his moderately sized bedroom, Alec grinned down at the pictures on his cell phone. Most of them were of Magnus in various states of looking gorgeous; smiling or sleeping or cooking or half dressed but usually with a fond look towards the camera. If he were awake of course. They were like secret treasures that he hoarded just for himself, for moments when he was sad or simply wanted a reminder that there was someone out there for him. That he wasn’t terribly alone anymore, watching everyone have the sort of romantic life he wished he could have. They were the main reason Alec kept his phone locked though he supposed no one would think twice about a friend having another friend on their phone.

Until they got to the shirtless in bed ones.

Training with Clary had gone well but while she was learning he was concerned she wasn’t learning fast enough for the rate she wanted to jump into things. She was behind having been raised as a mundane and it would take years to get her caught up to speed, years they didn’t have. Not to mention she was stubborn and rash, taking chances that didn’t need to be taken. She wanted to hunt _now_. She wanted to help _now_ and honestly he thought that was commendable in a way. They needed more Shadowhunters to help protect the city but she was a beginner. Her talent with runes aside she was still very much that mundane she didn’t want to be anymore. There was a lot she didn’t know and in their world that sort of thing could get you killed.

He understood that she wanted to help and he didn’t have a problem with it, but he wished she would stop acting like having Shadowhunter blood automatically meant she was built for the job. Without the right skills she was still just a girl. A talented girl but just a girl.

_Not that it really matters I guess. If Jace goes out hunting she is going to go or throw a tantrum about it._

Having Magnus in his life gave him a bit of perspective on that whole situation. A few months earlier he would have been super happy to hear Jace and Clary were brother and sister because it meant they had _no_ chance of being together. It meant Jace would be free for him to secretly pine for, and that he wouldn’t have to see him and Clary in any sort of romantic way. And, well, he would be lying if he said there wasn’t a tiny spark of that leftover. But there was also pity now. Pity at seeing his adopted brother so sad and emotionally wrecked because of the circumstances he had to deal with. Deep down all he really wanted was for Jace to be happy, in the past he’d just assumed that could only be achieved if _he_ was somehow in the mix.

The period of BC—before Clary—Alec had thought was a great time. Just the three of them fighting demons and living in the _Institute_ , relying on each other to have each others’ backs. Being able to spend as much time as he wanted with Jace without anyone interrupting or taking the focus away from him. He’d always worried about that day—the day someone would catch Jace’s eye long term and then their threesome would be a foursome. Or worse Jace would go off with whomever and leave him alone.

_Like he’d done with Clary…_

But that was okay. At the time it had been horrible of course but that wasn’t the case now. One day Jace would find someone and he would be alright with it.

Glancing back to his phone and the photo of Magnus in nothing but boxers, lounging among his soft covers, Alec itched with the urge to call his boyfriend and just hear his voice. But Magnus was working tonight and Alec didn’t want to seem clingy. Though he supposed in a way he was because more often than not he’d rather be spending time with the handsome warlock. Was it really clingy however if the other party also wanted to spend a lot of time with you?

_One text would be okay, right? It has been almost a full day since you’ve seen him. Just tell him you are thinking of him and that he doesn’t have to text back._

Suitably convinced, Alec snapped a picture of himself with what he hoped was a cute smile and sent it with the caption _thinking of you, no need to reply. –AL_

Before he could put his phone down it beeped with a message that read _thinking of you too, always. Will call later. Xoxo –MB_

Alec laughed and quickly stuffed his phone underneath his pillow as the door opened and Jace stuck his head in. “Hey.” He tried to play it cool. “Is something wrong?”

Jace arched a brow. “No…You were just so quiet I thought I would make sure everything was okay.”

“Oh. Yeah I’m fine.” Alec shrugged. “Just relaxing I guess you could say. I trained with Clary earlier.” Sitting up, he put his feet on the floor. “Did you uh—did you hear from Idris?”

“Not yet.” Jace frowned and entered the room fully, closing the door behind him. “I hate waiting.”

Alec smiled. “I know but I’m sure they’ll answer you soon. This is an important matter and it can’t be ignored.”

Running a hand through his wild blonde hair, Jace drifted over to sit beside him. “We both know the Clave is good at ignoring things they deem unimportant. Maybe they think whatever Valentine is trying to do is okay.”

Alec shook his head. “No I don’t believe that. Maybe—maybe in the past but things are different now. I told you this before.”

His friend smiled at him, crystal blue eyes soft and gentle. “You’re always my little voice of reason, aren’t you? Why don’t I listen to you more?”

 _Good question._ “Because you can’t let a day go by without being impulsive or you break out into hives?”

Jace chuckled. “That does sound like me. You told me that when I’m impulsive things go badly. Do you still believe that?”

Wetting his lips, Alec glanced down to his hands. “Yes and no. At the time I thought bringing Clary and Simon into the _Institute_ was risky because we didn’t know anything about them. They could have been evil. But finding out about Clary shed light onto Hodge’s deception—that he was still in league with Valentine after all these years—and that Valentine was very much alive.” Pause. “In the end it all provided useful information. And we have the Cup which is important.”

Jace hummed thoughtfully. “Yeah…”

Tilting his head to the side, Alec could sense his _parabatai_ had more on his mind than he was letting on. He usually did. “Something else on your mind?”

“Clary, actually.”

“Ah.”

“When Valentine told me he was my father I didn’t want to believe it and not just because of her. But she played a big part. Between how I feel-- _felt_ about her and the type of man Valentine is…”

“It—it’s okay to still love her. I mean that sort of thing doesn’t just go away.”

“Life would be easier if it did. Either way however until there is definite proof and not the ramblings of a mad man, Clary and I can never be more than what we are. If there is even a change that we’re related… I’m crazy, not sick.”

Alec grinned. “You’re being cautious. Never thought I would see the day.”

Rolling his eyes, Jace tapped his foot on the floor for a minute and then exhaled. “I know I probably don’t say this a lot—or ever—but I’m glad you’re in my life. I shudder to think where I would be if it weren’t for you always looking out for me.”

His friend blushed. “It’s what a _parabatai_ is for.”

Jace rubbed at his knuckles and the tiny silver scars on his hands. “True…but it’s more than that, isn’t it? More than _parabatai_ , more than brothers…”

Alec felt his heart skip a beat. “What? Wh—what are you talking about?”

“It’s okay; you don’t have to be worried. I…well I know you have a crush on me.” Jace explained delicately. “I suppose I’ve always known deep down but it became more noticeable when Clary arrived. You got…territorial.”

 _By the Angel this is_ not _happening!_ “I—I—what? N—no I—you’re wrong.”

Despite his flustering or perhaps because of it, Jace was smiling. “Really it’s okay. I don’t know why you thought I would care or worset, think it was gross. You know I’m not that type of person. I try not judge—I have no room. Especially not these days.”

Frowning and wondering what the hell was going on, Alec got up and paced a little. He was seriously considering bolting from the room but he supposed that would make him look guilty. As it was he had no idea how to react. Did this mean he was out now? “Jace I—I don’t know what you are talking about. I don’t even know where you are getting this. It—it’s—”

“Hey.” Jace stood and crossed the room to him, forcing him to stand still. “Relax.” He reached out and cupped Alec’s cheek, smoothing his thumb across his slightly parted lips. “Maybe this is a good thing. Maybe I’m finally seeing what has been right in front of me all along.”

Flushing, Alec’s eyes stretched so wide that he was afraid they would literally pop out of his head. He had no idea what was going on. Had Jace been struck in the head? Was he possessed? Was this _even_ Jace or was it a demon shapeshifter wearing his face? “You’re my _parabatai_ …” He whispered unable to move; Jace’s hand burning hot against his skin. “It’s illegal.”

Jace smirked. “Only if the Clave finds out about it. And I wouldn’t tell them. Would you?”

Alec blinked. “No.”

“Then there is no reason for us to not see where this leads.”

“I—”

“I know you want to.”

Taking a step back, Alec swayed with something like dizziness and used the door for support. Jace was basically saying things he’d wanted to hear from him for years now, and looking at him like he hung the moon. He touched his cheek; the heat of Jace’s hand still prevalent. So many times he’d dreamed about Jace recognizing him, seeing him as something other than a brother or best friend. And now apparently he was and Alec had no idea what to do with it.

Dragging his fingers through his black hair and making it disheveled, Alec exhaled shakily. “I do want to. At least I did.”

His _parabatai_ arched a brow. “Did? What’s changed? When did it change?” 

Alec looked at him. “Me.” _I have someone now. Someone real. I can’t hurt Magnus like that._ “Things are just different now. The—the time when I wanted—when I _thought_ I wanted something more with you has passed.”

Wetting his lips, Jace closed the small gap between them and caressed his cheek again, long fingers settling in the cradle of his jaw. “Are you sure? You’re not making a lot of sense. Are you scared? Is that it?”

“Of course it is.” Came a new voice, a familiar voice that made Alec jerk in surprised horror. “Isn’t he usually terrified of one thing or another?”

Waltzing out of the shadows with a big red grin, Camille came to stand beside Jace. “Terrified of vampires. Terrified Magnus doesn’t want him bad enough. Terrified he’ll suck his first time having sex.” Pause. “You will by the way.”

Alec glared at her. “How the hell did you get in here!?” His head whipped around for his weapons. “Jace, she’s a vampire. We need to get rid of her right now.”

Camille flipped her long silvery blonde hair. “Sweetheart you should take blondie here up on his offer. He _is_ more your type anyway, isn’t he? Just imagine these strong runed arms wrapping around you. I bet he’s a beast in the sack.” She bit her bottom lip. “Clary can’t have him…but you can. It’s everything you ever wanted. And if you’re worried about Magnus don’t be. Magnus will be fine. He isn’t right for you anyway. You should stay with your own kind.”

 _This is wrong. This is_ all _wrong._ “No. Magnus is—he’s perfect. I don’t know what this is but it’s not right. It doesn’t _feel_ right. What have you done to Jace?”

Before he could say anything else, Jace’s hand was wrapped tight around his neck and squeezing hard. He was slammed against the door, his head bouncing off the wood with a loud crack. Camille laughed and Jace grinned, his normal expression gone to be replaced by a monster. Teeth sharp like fangs and eyes red as a coal of fire; his smile stretched almost to his ears, taking up most of his face.

“Oops, you made him mad.” Camille said with a sing song tone. “Now you have to be punished.”

Jace dived towards his neck with a hiss and Alec—

Jerked awake so roughly that had the bed been smaller he would have tumbled right out of it. His heart was pounding loudly in his chest, causing a deep roaring in his ears. He cursed and sat up, pushing sweaty strands of hair off his forehead and turning on the bedside lamp. A hand came up to touch his neck and he was happy when his fingers returned dry and clean. No blood and no bites; it was just a dream. Or rather a nightmare considering the nature of it.

He hadn’t had one in a while but he guessed Camille was a little deeper into his subconscious than he wanted to let on. Why Jace was there, well, that wasn’t something he wanted to dwell on.

“Fuck.” Cursing lowly, he glanced down to Magnus to make sure he hadn’t awoken him only to see a single yellow eye gazing back at him. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Magnus shrugged his shoulders, the right side of his face still pressed into the pillows. “Are you alright?”

Alec nodded slowly. “Yeah it was just a stupid nightmare. Just when I think I am over them one pops up out of nowhere.”

The warlock hummed. “You were talking in your sleep.”

 _Oh shit._ “I was? What was I saying?”

Magnus stared at him. “You were murmuring Jace’s name. Are you sure it was a nightmare?”

Alec cringed. “It wasn’t a… _sex_ dream if that is what you are thinking. Jace sort of came onto me but he was a vampire and then Camille showed up to goad him into biting me. So yeah it was totally a nightmare.” Flopping back to the pillows, he groaned and rolled until he was as close as possible to Magnus. “My head is all screwed up and just knowing she is out there made it a little worse.”

Snorting, Magnus shifted onto his back and pulled his boyfriend half on top of him. “This is true.” His long fingers curled into the mass of Alec’s hair, massaging his scalp. “What do you think that dream was trying to tell you?”

“That I hate Camille?”

“Heh yes but what else?”

“Nothing else. Yeah I was into Jace at one point but I’m not anymore. I’m not.”

“I believe you.”

Alec snuggled into him and tucked his face into the hollow of Magnus’ neck. He desperately wanted to change the subject. “Are your eyes naturally like that?”

If Magnus sensed anything he didn’t comment on it. “Yes and no. I’ve used a glamour on them before so they’ll look normal but heightened emotion makes them change. If I’m extremely upset or stressed out they can stay cat-like for days. A long time ago when you were just what I’m sure was a precocious little brat, they didn’t change back to brown for months.”

It was odd to think of Magnus being this amazing man when he was just a toddler. Odd and a little intimidating because it reminded him of all the years between them; all of the things Magnus knew that he didn’t. But at least he hadn’t watched him grow up like with Clary. That would take the oddness to a whole new level. “I like them either way.”

Magnus patted his lower back. “Yes you find me very attractive. The feeling is mutual.”

Snickering, Alec licked his lips. “You—you’re not mad at me are you? Because I dreamed about Jace?”

The warlock’s brows drifted towards his hairline. “What? No. Seriously Alexander you worry about the silliest things. Why would I be angry over something you had no control over?” He traced a finger along the black rune on Alec’s neck. “I’m aware of the torch you carried for Jace. In another life I could understand why. He’s handsome, charismatic and somewhat of a rebel. I don’t blame you for being attracted to him.”

Alec’s lips twisted into an unhappy moue and he pressed a kiss to Magnus’ chest, right above his heart. “You are probably the most patient, understanding person I have ever met. Sometimes I think about my life and how it would be if you hadn’t saved me that night from the demon poison. If it had been some other warlock. I thought I was happy before but having _this_ proves how wrong I was.”

“You really know how to wake me up, don’t you Nephilim?” Magnus sat up and arranged Alec so that he was straddling his lap, sitting on his thighs in nothing but black boxers. “Are you going to say more pretty things to me?”

Alec rolled his eyes but he was smiling, he couldn’t help it really. “You’re not as smooth as you think you are.”

Winking, he dipped forward and pressed light kisses down the side of Alec’s neck. “I was smooth enough to get into your leather pants.”

Laughing, the Shadowhunter shoved at him playfully. “Maybe I should stop letting you get into them.”

Magnus nipped at his lips. “That would only end up hurting you in the end too.”

 _Damn it he’s right._ “What if the new rule was, you could touch me but I wouldn’t be touching you? Then you’d suffer.”

Magnus chuckled and his right hand dipped down between Alec’s legs to cup him through the material of his underwear. “But I like touching you. So as long as I could touch you while touching myself I would be okay.”

Swallowing hard, Alec held onto his biceps and kissed him passionately, sucking on his bottom lip. Masturbation itself wasn’t sexy but picturing Magnus doing it suddenly made it so. 

The hand on his cock gave a minute squeeze and he gasped, inching closer, turning the kiss wet and a little dirty, licking into Magnus’ hot mouth. He could still remember quite vividly the first time he’d met Magnus all half naked with glossy lips and dark rimmed eyes. Never had he imagined one day those lips would be his. His to kiss and kiss until his own were pleasantly numb and tingling. 

He didn’t need the dream of Jace when his reality with Magnus was so much better.

“You’re always trying to seduce me.” Alec mumbled happily.

“Is it working? Am I seducing you, young Lightwood?” Magnus asked cheekily. “Am I making you want to stay with me forever?”

“I already want that.” Alec whispered, immediately wishing he could take it back. It left him too open, too vulnerable and he would have pulled away had Magnus not tightened his hold.

“I want that too.” The warlock replied without a hint of deception. “I can’t imagine not needing an angel to perch on my shoulder.”

Alec blushed even as warmth swelled in his chest. Magnus had a habit of saying the most _romantic_ things to him, things that he wasn’t sure how to respond to. He’d never been good with words, not like Jace or Isabelle. He never had the snappy comebacks or the scathing barbs and he often felt out of his depth because of it. Even in his nightmare Camille had managed to stump him just like she did in real life.

It had only been about three weeks since Camille appeared in their lives, or reappeared as was the case for Magnus, and Alec would be lying if he said he wasn’t still unnerved. He tried not to be but her words continued to swim around inside of his head on a constant loop, bringing up more questions than he had answers. The very fact alone that she _knew_ Magnus, that she could picture him in a different time with a different look irked Alec to no end. If he reminded himself they’d slept together many times, well he was liable to make his brain explode out of his ears.

She had probably said romantic things to Magnus all the time. Off the cuff things with her stupid air of superiority, with the glow of gas lamps making her look ethereal or something.

He hated it.

The glimmer of sunlight that cut through that type of darkness however was that _he_ was the one with Magnus now. He was seeing him whenever he could and sharing a bed with him whenever possible. Magnus was his and having any tiny part of him was like holding a shooting star between his fingers. So bright; he was scared it would burn him whole but there was no way he was letting go. Not if he could help it.

 _“You’re in love with him…”_ Camille had crowed right before basically calling him an idiot for it. He didn’t know anything about love, not romantic love anyway. And as bad as it sounded he did not think his parents were a good example of such things. They didn’t have the spark that other couples had. He was certain they loved each other but not the kinda love you read about in books. Not that burn for you, yearn for you love that some people had.

That Jace and Clary might have had before Valentine’s revelation.

Alec decided that he wasn’t going to think about love—at all—until he could be one hundred percent truthful in every aspect of his life. At least that was what he _told_ himself whenever Camille’s words echoed in his brain, or whenever Magnus looked at him like he was looking at him now. It was easier to have conviction when the stakes weren’t so high.

Magnus tapped his temple. “I wonder what’s going on in that gorgeous brain of yours. Anything you want to talk about?”

Alec lowered his eyes. “Not really. I’m sure you have enough on your mind without me adding to it with my weird…whatever.”

“Oh please. I’ll always have time for you no matter what.” Magnus nuzzled behind his ear. “I know you don’t think so or believe me when I say this, but you don’t bring anything into my life that I can’t handle. That I don’t _want_ to handle.” His eyes grew soft, his long fingers tucking dark strands of hair off Alec’s forehead. “What can I say? I’m a sucker for a pretty face.”

Snickering but touched, Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus’ neck and hugged him. It was sort of pathetic to think but it would take him a while to understand completely why Magnus seemed to treasure him as much as he did. Not because he didn’t know how it felt to be cared for, but because it was just inherently different in a non-familial sense. It was different to have a stranger come in and suddenly be there for you and want to keep you safe. Things changed when someone saved your life.

Releasing a shuddering breath, Alec just held Magnus for a few moments, thankful that Magnus let him without saying anything. He wished they could stay in this cocoon of warmth and hazy light forever, where he could always be himself no matter what. Lately it was feeling like he had two faces and he wasn’t sure which one was the real one anymore. He liked aspects of them both; hopefully one day he could merge or something.

Magnus kissed his bare shoulder. “I have something for you.” With a snap of his fingers and a flash of bluish sparks came a tiny black box. It appeared on the bed out of thin air. “Open it. I was going to wait to give it to you on what I considered a special occasion but now seems like a good time too.”

Alec wet his lips and slowly opened the box, pulling out the simple ring with fingers he was thankful didn’t shake. It was shiny and silver with a thick band; totally ordinary and something a guy would wear if he just liked rings. Nothing like the Lightwood ring on his dresser back at the _Institute_. “Did you buy this?”

Magnus smirked. “No it’s…an antique. I…saw it somewhere and it made me think of you. Solid, rare, unbreakable, beautiful…” Pause. “Whisper _malaikatku_ against it.”

The word rolled off Magnus’ tongue easily and Alec found his curiosity piqued. “What language is that?”

“Indonesian…”

“Is that—are you…”

“Yes.”

Deciding prying was for another time, Alec brought the ring to his lips and whispered _malaikatu_ as he’d been instructed to do. The metal grew warm and started to glow with tiny bluish looping script; the light much like that of a Shadowhunter’s weapons when invoked by an angel’s name. The symbols ran around the ring repeatedly in a lazy circle in a language he couldn’t make out. Idly he wondered if they too were Indonesian. Not that it mattered at all when it came to the beauty of the piece of jewelry. He slipped it onto his finger, vowing to never lose it.

“I love it.” He said honestly. “What—what do the symbols mean?”

Magnus kissed his knuckles. “My angel. _Malaikatku_ means my angel. That’s what you are, right?”

Face heated, Alec cupped Magnus’ cheeks and searched his eyes. He wasn’t good with words and feared he never would be but even he could offer up a simple _yes_. So he did. “Yes. Yes I am.” Biting his lip, he smiled. “How do I say _my warlock_ in Indonesian?”

Amused, Magnus replied, “ _Warlock saya. Saya warlock Anda._ ”

The Shadowhunter felt deliriously happy and couldn’t stop his grin from expanding to the point where his eyes were crinkled at the sides. He would have to get his boyfriend something good too. Something sincere though he had no idea where to even begin; it wasn’t like he was the best at giving birthday presents let alone something that was supposed to encapsulate everything he felt about someone. Especially when he wasn’t sure that the rumbling in his stomach was called. Not really.

Climbing off Magnus’ lap, he stretched out onto the mattress. “You know I’d love to learn Indonesian if you’d be willing to teach me. Certain phrases anyway…”

The warlock slipped down to mirror his pose. “Maybe. It’s—well it’s not a language I have much need for anymore. Anyone I would have spoken it to or with is dead.” He frowned but shook it away. “Besides I’d much rather teach you Italian.”

Alec grabbed his hand. “That would be cool too. Magnus I—I know you don’t want to dwell on the past and I understand but it’s okay if you talk about it sometimes. Believe it or not but I want to know _all_ about you. Not just the you from now but the you from back then too. I’d really like to see pictures if you have any. Or paintings I guess since the camera hasn’t always been around.”

Magnus chuckled. “I’ll see what I can do…” Turning to look at the clock, he smoothed a hand across his face. “We should get some sleep.”

 _Why are you so sad inside, Magnus? What don’t you want me to know about you?_ “I’m blowing off training tomorrow. Spending the whole day with you. I’ll even let you take me shopping.”

“Really?” And just like that Magnus’ eyes were bright and dancing. “And you’ll model all the clothes for me?”

“Ugh. Fine. But nothing too outrageous like a cape or whatever.”

“Even _I_ wouldn’t be caught dead in a cape.”

Alec opened his mouth to reply when the sound of his cell phone drew his attention to the bedside table. He reached for it and answered with what he hoped sounded like a sleepy _hello_.

“Alec!” It was Isabelle and she frantic. “We need you! The humans are under attack!”

He was up and out of bed in seconds. “What humans? Under attack by who? Or what?”

“Some campground a few miles from here.” She explained. “We got a fire message to go there immediately or there would be nothing left. Something like this has never happened before and Jace is sure it is a trap but we’re going. If mundanes are in danger…”

“Isabelle I need directions! I can’t just—just _find_ my way there.” Alec demanded as he struggled into his clothes. “Or a name! What’s the campground called?”

“Jace! What’s the campground called?” A beat. “Crystal Lake Park. Can you get there?”

Alec cut his eyes to Magnus who was sitting up in the bed and watching him intensely. “Yes I can get there.”

“Good. Go now because we’re using the portal.” And then she was gone.

Hanging up, Alec searched for his shoes. “Magnus I need a portal. There is an attack happening right now and innocent lives are at stake.”

Magnus crawled out of bed and was dressed in seconds thanks to his magic. “Of course. Where am I taking us?”

The Shadowhunter paused briefly before hurrying out of the bedroom and into the living room where he’d left his weapons. “Crystal Lake Park.”

Cracking his knuckles, Magnus flicked his hand and his furniture parted like the Red Sea, giving him a wide open space in the room. His fingers lifted and blue sparks danced brightly from the tips. “Let’s do this then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I usually do my dream sequences in italics but I wanted this one to be a surprise. ^_^ Thank you for all of the reviews/kudos and sorry for the wait! Had technical difficulties. Enjoy!


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait; I procrastinated. :) Thank you for the reviews/kudos and please if you enjoy this chapter let me know! Also if anyone is curious the song Magnus listens to in this chapter is Give Me All Your Love by Alabama Shakes.

Chapter Three

As a warlock Magnus believed in the impossible and the unpredictable. He knew that ghosts were real and that if you could imagine it, there was a chance it was out there waiting to kill you. So when he and Alec arrived by way of portal to the middle of Crystal Lake Park, he couldn’t help but wonder if one Jason Voorhees was behind the attacks they had been told about. It would make sense for him to be a demon if he in fact existed. Only a demon could die repeatedly and yet be reborn to wreak more havoc. Of course he supposed if Jason _were_ alive somewhere, someone would have definite proof. As it was Alec had no idea why he seemed slightly amused so he made a mental note to show him the Friday the 13th movies later. It made no sense for the handsome Shadowhunter to go through life without knowing the classics.

The air was thick with the smell of dense fog and something pungent, like rotting eggs. His nose twitched and he glanced up at the sky, his eyes immediately honing in on the blood red moon where it peaked out from between fluffy clouds. Blood moons were very rare but if you were lucky to get caught under one and knew a bit of magic, you could harness it as a small celestial event for very powerful rituals. He figured that explained the _feeling_ of where they were—like crooked hands were hiding between the tall trees, just waiting to reach out and grab them.

It was too quiet; not even the animals were stirring. There were several compact campers parked a few spaces a part but they didn’t have any lights on. A dying fire pit with fading red embers was the only sign that anyone had recently been in the area. Well except for the bits and pieces that only supernatural eyes could see. Tiny slashes of clothing dotting thorny bushes. Several footprints stomped into the dirt, some obviously moving fast while others turned into a slow drag, possibly meaning they had been forcefully taken. And of course the blood.

Hardly perceptible but it was there, metallic and wet, splashed red against a tree trunk or mixed in with the mud. All signs pointed to some type of struggle and honestly, Magnus didn’t like their chances of finding anyone alive.

Alec had his long knives out, gloved hands wrapped tight around the crystal hilts. He was standing in front of Magnus almost like a shield; big blue eyes a little wild as he surveyed the area. He appeared more or less put together but Magnus could see the pulse ticking rapidly in his neck. He was unnerved but it made sense—they were entering into a battle with an unknown foe.

A twig snapped off to the side and Alec whirled, mouth opening to name his blade when a familiar figure popped into view. “Jace?”

Jace nodded and came closer with Isabelle, Simon and Clary following behind him. “You made it.”

Alec arched a brow. “What are they doing here?” He motioned to Clary and Simon. “No offence but they’re not exactly warriors. Clary hasn’t had nearly enough training and Simon hasn’t had any at all.”

Jace didn’t disagree. “Clary _refused_ to stay behind and well, that of course meant Simon was tagging along as well. I gave them weapons. If worse comes to worse they can chuck them at the bad guys.”

Alec shook his head. “We don’t even know what we are up against and you allowed them to come? What if it’s demons or something none of us can defeat?”

Clary lifted a small hand. “If it’s demons I can draw a rune to stun them so that you can kill them. I’ve done it before.” She wet her lips. “I—I know I don’t know how to fight well but I wanted to help. I can’t just sit inside the _Institute_ while people are in danger. I won’t get in the way.”

Magnus tilted his head to the side. “I suppose we’ll see, won’t we biscuit?” Pushing his hood back a little, he exhaled. “How long have you guys been here?”

Isabelle made a face. “We arrived about ten minutes before you two. Honestly what could have done this? Where are all the people?”

Simon was cringing. “I smell blood but it’s like, wrong. Does that make sense?”

Jace arched a brow. “It depends on the type of _wrong_ you are talking about. Perhaps if you could add a few more adjectives to that sentence…”

Simon frowned at him. “ _Wrong_. I don’t know—normal blood smells sort of like metal and this smells like _not_ metal. Or burnt metal. Either way it’s totally rank and all over.”

“Not helpful at all.” Jace smirked. “Maybe we should split up and—”

Before he could finish a large mangled lawn chair was being hurled out of the darkness to smash into the side of an RV. It hit with so much force that the windows shattered and the vehicle rocked dangerously onto two wheels, almost tipping over onto its side. Everyone gasped and watched as several bent and gnarled figures loped out of the woods, their faces and bodies stretched beyond normal limits. They looked to be in so much pain but their eyes were wide with an uncontrollable rage even Magnus wasn’t used to seeing.

“Wh—what are they?” Clary stammered. “They look—they look—”

“Human.” Jace reached for his sword. “They were but someone has Marked them. Mundanes can’t withstand the process of being Marked so this is what happens. We call them Forsaken.”

That was all the explanation the sad yet grisly creatures allowed before attacking much like a pack of rabid dogs. If they lived Magnus assumed Clary would want a more thorough description and he wouldn’t blame her.

As far as he could tell there were nine in all; nine once lovely campers that were now nothing more than mindless beasts. Their pale skin branded with black runes, causing distortions no one should have to endure. He couldn’t imagine who was evil enough to put a mortal through something like this but he had a pretty good idea who didn’t give a fuck about anything either way. He wasn’t going to say it aloud until they were safe but if this wasn’t the work of Valentine or another member of his disbanded circle, he’d buy a hat and eat it.

One of the women—or what used to be a woman—howled and swung out madly with a tire iron she must have pulled off an RV. She didn’t seem to care who or what she hit as long as she took something down. You couldn’t really control a Forsaken as far as he knew. You just made them and unleashed them on an unsuspecting world to cause as much damage as possible. If even one got out into the general public hundreds would be hurt before it was ultimately put down.

_Yet that begs the question how did anyone but the creator know they were here in the first place?_

Shaking off those thoughts, Magnus cracked his knuckles and conjured up a bright ball of blue fire, sending it into the air so that they could better see. Jace was in front of Clary, trying to keep her safe and fend off the giant man with deformed hands looming over them. Isabelle was cracking her silver whip at anything that came near her while Simon looked for _something_ constructive to do with the dagger he held. Alec of course took point beside Jace.

He was a vision in motion; striking out at whatever came near and ignoring the wounds inflicted to himself. Shadowhunters fought with poetry but Magnus would always find Alec’s style to be the best.

The good thing about Forsaken was that they weren’t extremely difficult to kill, but they were fast and unafraid of dying. They used their bodies like tools—like blunt instruments of destruction to maim and crush without thought.

Jace was tossed aside like a rag doll where he rolled over the fire pit with a grunt. Clary cried out to him and barely ducked being struck in the head by a gangly arm. She thrust out with her knife and stabbed her attacker high in the shoulder with enough force to send him staggering back. But just for a moment. Almost trance-like he wretched the knife out and lunged at her. He would have caught her about the face had Alec not jumped in front of her and kicked him in the stomach, wincing slight as the blade’s tip scratched down his arm.

Magnus’ fingers twisted in thin air and he hurled a spear made of flame at the monster, burning him to screaming ashes in a matter of seconds. And _that_ was how he got the attention of the others. It was well and truly a battle now.

Perhaps if they couldn’t handle objects it would have been easier but they used whatever they could get their hands on. Tree branches, heavy rocks, sneakers—nothing was off limits. The creatures surged like a wave, dipping in and out of the fog to land punches and kicks. What was once a blonde woman dislocated Clary’s shoulder and sent her tumbling into the bushes. It punched Jace with sharp knuckles and opened up a cut across his cheek but he was able to kill it, ripping its guts out with a deep wound across its stomach.

The warlock didn’t exactly have time to watch or fret about the others because he was dealing with two of his own. He almost shuddered to look at them; their bald heads and bulging eyes. One gripped a simple butter knife like a lifeline while the other whipped at him wildly with a thick stick. He was driven backwards and caught the stick as it meant to bash in his skull, kicking out the thing’s knee with a sickening crack. It dropped to the ground and he yanked the branch away, using it to repel the knife heading for his eye. Jumping clear, he lit them both up and watched as they writhed but continued to try to crawl after him until they were dead.

Several things happened next—so quickly he nearly couldn’t get a fix on them. A brutish man still wearing his baseball cap crashed into Isabelle like a meteor and they both fell to the ground in a tangle of limbs and shouting. Her head bounced off a rock and for a minute she was still. Too still. Simon yelped and _leapt_ into the fight, wrapping his skinny but inhumanly strong arms around the man’s neck and dragging him back as far as he could. The man struggled and folded in on himself with a roar, stunning Simon motionless.

When it pulled away Magnus realized why. It had expelled three sharp spikes from its back, catching Simon in the chest and stomach. His eyes rolled back into his head and he fell, deaf to the sound of Clary screaming.

And Clary, lovely _stupid_ Clary who thought more about her loved ones than her own safety ran to him. Ran right into the path of this hulking creature with nothing but her stele in her hand. It shook as she attempted to draw a rune on her arm that would no doubt help the situation though there wasn’t time. Cursing, Magnus raced closer, ready to burn the thing from the inside out when it spun on its large feet and jerked its arms out like it was stretching. The middle spike in his back shot out like a bullet directly into Magnus’ stomach, forcing its way out through the other side. He gasped, tasting thick blood in his mouth before sinking slowly to his knees. 

It was hard to breathe and the pain _burned_ ; seared through his muscles and into his bones. All of his magical focus went towards healing himself the best he could and not passing out; his dark eyes barely managing to see anything at all. He heard someone scream his name but truthfully wasn’t sure who had done it. It could have been any of them if they all cared though surely Alec cared the most.

_Fuck…_

The remaining five Forsaken formed a semi-circled around them with one going for Jace, one for Clary and two for Isabelle because she was starting to stir and they couldn’t have that. _Spike_ trudged towards him to finish what he had started.

And Alec…Alec _hesitated_. He was almost to Magnus, blade bright and burning blue with some angel’s name. But upon seeing his sister in danger his feet skidded on tiny stones and he met Magnus’ gaze before his face closed off and he jumped over a log to save his sister. Magnus was pretty certain he was too delirious with pain to be offended or concerned. He sat back on his heels and watched the monster approach knowing full well he wouldn’t be able to kill it without killing himself. Hell the only thing keeping him from bleeding out was the damn metal-like spear still inside of him.

“Fuck.” He muttered with red stained lips. “Might as well go out with a bang.”

Releasing the power he was using to keep himself conscious, he lifted a shaking hand and curled it into a fight fist. Spike gurgled, the sounds of his bones breaking loud even to Magnus’ own ears. He swayed on clawed feet and then exploded like a stick of dynamite, sending clumps of flesh and spraying blood everywhere. Magnus chuckled slowly…and then promptly passed out.

_“Magnus! Magnus, please! MAGNUS!”_

His eyelids felt like they weighed a ton when he attempted to open them. The ground was cold and hard beneath him but he noticed his head was pillowed on something soft. He was thankful for that. He didn’t want to die with a head full of monster stained sand. There was a hand pressing down hard on his stomach and he groaned, the sensation of needles pricking his arms and legs.

The voice came again, calling to him distressed and frantic. “Magnus please, _please_ don’t die! By the Angel we need to get him back to the Institute!”

“No.” He coughed, finally able to see what was going on.

His head was in Alec’s lap—naturally—and Clary was to his right holding his hand and her shoulder. Isabelle was sitting at his feet with a dazed yet concerned expression. In truth Magnus expected to see Simon dead but was surprised to find him just pulling away from Jace, his wounds healed and his mouth stained red with what was no doubt Jace’s blood.

_Huh._

“Magnus!” Alec shifted so that he could see him better. “Wha—what do we do!? I—I pulled the spike out and you—you won’t stop bleeding. What do we do? How do I help you?”

“Not sure you can, angel.” Magnus whispered. “Modern medicine hasn’t been tested on warlocks and even if it had, there isn’t a hospital for miles. And I don’t have the strength to heal myself let alone open a portal.”

Alec’s eyes were beautiful even shining with tears. His lower lip was trembling with the effort not to let them fall. “I—wait! Strength? You need strength?” Grabbing Magnus’ hands, he held them tight in his own. “Take mine. Please Magnus. I read that warlocks can do that so please, do it. Drain me if you have to but just don’t die.”

Magnus felt woozy; everything was glassy around the edges. For one brief moment he considered giving up. He’d lived a mostly good life and if he died protecting someone, well, that wasn’t a bad way to go. It was more than most got. But on the other hand he still had so much _living_ to do. So many new experiences to throw himself into. And of course there was Alec…

Smiling, he squeezed the Shadowhunter’s fingers. “Alright. I’ll try.”

Despite being bruised and caked with dried blood, Alec’s smile was brilliant. It didn’t escape Magnus that he was paying no attention to the way his friends were looking at him or what they may have been thinking. All of his attention was on Magnus and their entwined hands. _He’ll probably worry himself to death over it later._ Wetting his lips, Magnus closed his eyes and allowed his power to—albeit weakly—rise to the surface. It flowed out of his palms as a muted blue and into the deep life lines of Alec’s, running into his veins and up his arms. Between their clasped hands a white light began to glow, growing brighter the further the blue traveled. By the time it reached Alec’s neck he was gasping, mouth parted and cheeks flushed.

Magnus could feel his insides stitching themselves back together using that almighty Shadowhunter divinity, born from angel blood and magic runes. It was bad to say but in a way it felt like snorting cocaine which he’d only tried once and decided he didn’t care for it. But that _rush_ —that _otherness_ —was nearly the same. The sluggishness disappeared and he was alert, able to see the situation a lot clearer. He could have probably made himself totally better but he wasn’t greedy. He took just enough to not die and then pulled back.

Sagging a little, Alec brushed sweaty strands of hair out of his face and exhaled. He licked his lips and cleared his throat, reaching to push aside the fabric of Magnus clothes to check his wound. “It’s just a bruise now though it looks really angry. How do you feel?”

“Better.” Magnus admitted. “What happened to the rest of the Forsaken?”

“We killed them.” He replied, hands still on the warlock’s chest. “And then I—I came to make sure you were still—that you were still…”

“That’s good.” Magnus smiled softly.

“Speak for yourself.” Jace stumbled closer. “I just let Simon get to second base and I’m secure enough to admit it was kinda pleasant.”

Simon hastily wiped at his mouth. “Please _never_ say it like that again.” He accepted the sideways hug Clary gave him. “Can we leave now?”

Clary sighed deeply. “I wouldn’t mind getting my shoulder looked at.”

Jace ran his long fingers through his blonde hair. “Here.” Taking a firm grip of Clary’s arm, he yanked and she squealed as her shoulder was jammed back into place. “Better?”

“Jesus Christ! A little warning next time?” She cringed and hissed. “God that hurt like a bitch.”

Jace smiled but didn’t say anything.

Suddenly the air lit up in a mixture of red and gold with letters growing brighter as they came more into focus. There was silence as the group took them in; let the gravity of what they meant settle deep into their brains.

_Give me the Cup._

“We should go.” Alec helped Isabelle stand and then offered a hand to Magnus. “We need to tell the others about this.”

In retrospect Magnus probably should have remained at the _Institute_ for a while but decided against it. He used his boost from Alec to create a portal to get them there and then took a cab home. Gently rebuffed Alec’s quiet pleading that he should stay and be thoroughly examined. They had Shadowhunter business to attend to and he wasn’t a Shadowhunter. Besides he didn’t want to divert Alec’s loyalties.

Once home, he fed the Chairman and stripped as he made his way into his spacious bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror and touched the fist sized bruise on his stomach, frowning at its soreness. There was a matching one on his back. For a brief minute he grasped the sink and just stared as his reflection. Two yellow eyes stared back at him but they looked neither happy nor angry just contemplative. Tonight had been tough but not the toughest he’d lived through in his long life. However it reminded him why wars were sort of pointless.

Sitting on the edge of his ivory bathtub, he turned on the water and absently watched it fill. He felt bad for all of those poor people and the families that would assume they were attacked by wolves and mangled beyond recognition. Innocent causalities and the fucked up part was that there would be more. Maybe not humans but more in general. Valentine wouldn’t stop until he got the Cup and obviously he was willing to use every single damn trick in his arsenal. They would all have to be on alert just in case.

Choosing the bubble bath he wanted, he squirted in a good amount and waved it around with his hand so that it would foam. As it was wont to do his mind drifted to Alec and everything that encompassed. He hadn’t worried about appearances once but he’d been too busy fighting of course. Once things were quiet again he’d most likely think about _how it looked_ to have Magnus’ head in his lap or share energy with him. Might even try to make excuses to his sister and his friends. Especially to Jace. Magnus was too tired to care.

And he wasn’t angry that Alec had gone to his sister’s side instead of killing the Forsaken gunning for him. It made the most sense and he hoped Alec didn’t beat himself up over it when he ultimately remembered. As mysterious and guarded as Alec was, one thing stood out crystal clear about him and that was his love for his family. He would have gladly sacrificed himself if it meant Jace or Isabelle were okay.

Magnus had never known that type of devotion but he wasn’t bitter. Life was—it was what it was and he knew how to navigate it better than anyone. Using magic that he shouldn’t have been, he dimmed the lights, conjured candles and turned the stereo on. He sunk into the hot water with an exhausted sigh and leaned his head back to the built in cushion.

He was glad this night was almost over.

*

“Alec, wait!”

With one hand already on the door, Alec swallowed hard and glanced up to the stairs where Isabelle slowly made her way down. By the Angel she was okay, nothing more than a slight concussion and a few cuts that had been taken care of with a healing rune. Now she was simply tired and he’d expected her to go straight to bed after checking on Simon, who was spending the night since he apparently felt _weird_ after feeding on Jace. Alec vaguely even remembered him bite his _parabatai_ because he’d been too worried about Magnus at the time. After killing the two creatures going after his sister and making sure she was alright, he’d all but threw himself at the unconscious warlock, fearing the worst. He could have burst into tears when he felt a pulse.

“Isabelle you should be in bed.” He told her. “It’s late.”

She nodded. “I know and I’m going but I wanted to talk to you first. I wanted to thank you for saving my life.”

He snorted. “You don’t have to thank me. You’re my sister; of course I’m going to save your life if it’s within my power to do so. Just as I know you would do the same for me.”

She hugged him. “I would in a second.” Touching his cheek, she chuckled. “You’re going to see Magnus.” Before he could reply, she hushed him. “It’s okay. Alec you’re my brother and I love you. That will _never_ change. There is nothing you could tell me about yourself that would change how I see you. Do you know how I see you?”

Shaking his head, he glanced to his shoes. He knew how _others_ would see him.

Tipping up his chin, she squared her shoulders. “I see your sincerity and your compassion and your ability to inspire the best in others. I see you fighting for what is right. I see you protecting this family and everyone in it, sometimes without regard to your own safety. I even see you slowly accepting Clary and Simon into our world.” A beat. “Alec you’re a good man and I—I wish these boundaries weren’t in place that make you feel less than what you are. I understand why you shy away from the truth of yourself and that’s alright. It’s _your_ truth and you’ll come to it when you’re ready. But please just know I am in your corner. Always.”

When he didn’t answer she grinned and kissed his cheek. “Give my regards to Magnus and tell him I hope he feels better. He saved Clary’s life tonight.” Patting his shoulder, she turned and jogged back up the stairs, disappearing around a corner.

Alec released the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and leaned against the door. His hands were slightly shaking and he felt hollowed out, his sister’s words swimming around inside of his head. She knew—of course she knew and it was stupid to ever think otherwise. But he’d liked the denial because it made him feel safe. He’d never expected her to shun him or throw him away but being able to deny was a safety net he’d clung to for most of his life. However if he were being honest having it out—at least to her—tossed a weight off his shoulders. He could talk to her about relationship stuff if he needed and she wouldn’t judge him.

She wouldn’t judge him.

Now he only had to worry about judging himself.

Dragging a hand across his wet eyes, he slipped out of the _Institute_ and headed towards Magnus’ apartment as fast as his fatigued legs would let him. The sight of that spike slamming through the warlock’s body was something he would never forget. It was one of the single worst moments in his life and he didn’t have a lot of those. But that was possibly worse than being impaled by a demon. Watching Magnus stagger and fall to his knees…seeing the blood soak his dark clothes even darker… He’d screamed. He hadn’t meant to but the sound was basically ripped from his throat without his consent.

_They were just getting started! Was this how it was going to end?_

And then the Forsaken started to him just as two started for Isabelle and he— _fuck_ —he’d had to _chose_ and it wasn’t fair! He hadn’t wanted to lose either of them but Isabelle was his sister. She was his flesh and blood and he couldn’t lose another sibling, he just couldn’t. He hoped he could save her and then save Magnus but a part of him knew he’d be too late. That Isabelle would live but Magnus would die and it would be _his_ fault. At the time he wasn’t sure how he would live with that guilt. Even _if_ he could live with it.

_Magnus is probably furious with me. I basically left him to die. He has to hate me. I hate me._

In the end he was just beyond grateful that he was able to help heal Magnus. And he wasn’t lying he would have given him every last bit of his strength if it saved his life. He wished he had taken more.

By the time he reached Magnus’ home he was running on fumes but pushed himself to keep going. He slipped inside of the building and up the stairs to the loft, using his key to let himself inside. The lights were off but the music was on and loud; thick base vibrating along the walls. There was no way Magnus was asleep so Alec exhaled and slowly made his way into the bedroom but found it empty. Dancing lights however shined out of the master bathroom.

_I’ll beg him for forgiveness. I’ll even get on my knees if that is what it takes. I have to explain. He_ has _to let me explain._

Alec found Magnus immersed in a white bubble bath with a blue cigarette hanging from his lax fingertips. His eyes were closed and he was mouthing the words to the song playing in time with a woman’s smoky voice belting out _give me all your love_. He looked almost serene and totally gorgeous, relaxing away the day’s events. It was nearly enough to make Alec back away and leave as if he’d never came in the first place.

But he couldn’t.

“Ma—Magnus?” He said loud enough to be heard. “I—are you—I can leave if you want.”

Yellow cat eyes opened and Magnus smiled at him. “Why would you do that?”

“I…” Biting his bottom lip, he shrugged. “I thought you might want me to.”

“Why would I want that?” Magnus questioned. “I didn’t expect to see you until tomorrow afternoon but I’m glad you’re here. Are you hungry?”

_After what he’s been through and he’s asking after me?_ The Shadowhunter didn’t even think about it. He slipped out of his clothes as quickly as he could, leaving them in a dark pile on the floor. Magnus arched a brow and looked him over with the same brimming lust that he always did, making him blush. Alec didn’t give himself time to think about it, he stepped into the pleasantly warm water and wedged himself between Magnus and the tub. Magnus sighed and rested back against him, the warlock’s back to his strong chest. Together they sunk a little lower to get comfortable and Alec idly scrubbed at his boyfriend’s skin with a pink spongy thing.

_Ask him…_ “How are you feeling?”

Magnus took a drag from his cigarette. “Just tired, sweetheart. Just tired.”

Alec peeped at the side of his face. “Yeah I—I think we could all sleep for a week or something.”

Magnus yawned. “I’m taking a mini vacation from jobs in which I don’t leave the apartment and watch bad tv. Well I might leave to get the mail but that’s it.”

The Shadowhunter kissed his cheek. “Sounds like a good plan. Until Idris gets back to us on the Valentine problem we’re sort of…at a stalemate. I’d love to join you if that’s okay...?”

“Sure it’s okay. There are some movies I want to show you actually.”

“Magnus I am so, so sorry. I—if you had died I would have never forgiven myself. I wanted to make it to you. I was going to _die trying_ but Isabelle is—she’s my sister and I couldn’t…”

“Alec you have nothing to apologize for. I completely understand.”

“No I need you to hear me. I need you to know that I would never sacrifice you for anything in the world. You’re not—that’s not what you are to me.”

Taking one of his hands, Magnus kissed his knuckles. “I _know_. I’m not upset I swear. I realized exactly why you went to your sister. She’s your _sister_. She’s blood.”

_Yes but…_ “She is and I would die for her. It’s not just that we are blood but we—we lost a sibling years ago and it’s sort of…our family has never exactly recovered. We have parents of course but sometimes I feel like Isabelle is the only one who truly knows me and understands me. Even more so than Jace.” Alec frowned, feeling like he wasn’t explaining things well at all. “I didn’t want you to die.”

“I know.” Magnus said simply. “And we’re fine, angel. You and I are fine. I get it’s going to take you a while to believe me and that’s okay. Tonight was traumatic all the way around. Tomorrow will be better.”

Letting the sponge disappear under all the bubbles, Alec wrapped his arms around the tops of Magnus’ shoulders and buried his face into his silky black hair. So many emotions were bombarding him and he wondered if this was what relationships were all about. Feeling like you were falling most of the time until _boom_ , a hand suddenly had you and everything was okay. He felt _okay_ with Magnus. Grounded.

_“ You’re in love with him.”_ “Magnus? How long do you think until Camille realized she loved you? That she was in love with you?”

The warlock blinked. “Odd question out of nowhere but…I think she might have loved me at one time but it wasn’t deep. I don’t think she was ever _in_ love with me. Why?”

The Shadowhunter shook his head. “No reason.”

Magnus snorted. “Right.” Snuffing out his cigarette, he slipped a hand under the water and smoothed it along Alec’s thigh. “Am I going to have to use less than honest means to get it out of you?”

Alec shivered. “I—you’re hurt so we can’t.”

Chuckling, Magnus patted his knee. “We could as long as you don’t knee me in the stomach. But seriously, talk to me. I know something is bothering you.”

_That’s because you know so much about so many things._ “Camille said some stuff to me that night she cornered me—you know that. At the time I thought she was just being a bitch and while I’m sure she was; now I’m wondering if there was truth to it as well. And if there was how I feel about it.”

Magnus hummed knowingly. “Well take your time, Alexander. You can’t rush these things after all.”

No but life or death situations could lift the veil so that you could see all sides. He knew he cared about Magnus more than he’d cared about anyone else. And it wasn’t familial or friend-like, it was all romantic. _Would it be so bad if Camille was right? Baring the fact it’s_ Camille?

_I’m too tired for this right now._ Groaning, he looked around for a towel. “We should go to bed. It has to be almost morning by now.”

Magnus pouted. “But I’m so comfortable.”

“I could carry you.”

“Ooh sounds sexy. You and your big strong Shadowhunter arms.”

“On second thought—” Cutting himself off, Alec smiled and decided he didn’t want to be a smart ass for once. Or shy away from feelings. “I guess. My big strong Shadowhunter arms and I would carry you anywhere. Out of Hell itself if it came to that.”

“I see.” Slowly Magnus sat up and shifted around in the large tub until he was sitting in Alec’s lap, long legs folded underneath him so that he could straddle Alec’s thighs. “That is very romantic.”

Alec’s brain short circuited. “Yeah?”

Magnus laughed at his expression and then kissed him, and as usual Alec tumbled into the kiss eagerly. He wanted to wrap his arms around the warlock and pull him closed but he didn’t want to hurt him, so instead he placed his hands on his hips and squeezed. Magnus purred and flicked out his tongue; Alec opening gratefully to let it slide against his. He loved kissing Magnus. Loved how passionate it became and how overwhelming it left him feeling. He loved that he couldn’t contain his noises when it came to Magnus touching him. He loved…

“Ah, Magnus…” His thoughts skidded to a halt as a hot mouth descended onto his nipples, sucking one then the other. “But—the soap…”

“God you are so adorable.” Magnus grinned and smoothed his fingers over Alec’s runed skin reverently. “Adorable and so beautiful…and all mine. How did I get so lucky?”

“I wonder the same thing about you.” Alec replied softly.

“ _Malaikatku_.” Magnus whispered before leaning in and capturing Alec’s mouth again.

The kissed slowly for quite a while, until Alec’s lips were red and he desperately needed air but didn’t want to move away. Still he was thankful when Magnus rested their foreheads together so they could pant against each other. His skin was flushed and his blood singing, his body yearning for more—always more—of Magnus Bane. Tentatively he touched Magnus’ scruffy cheek and down along his neck, admiring the color of his skin and the definition of his chest. Magnus called him beautiful but _he_ was the beautiful one. Sometimes he didn’t even look real.

Wetting his lips, he exhaled and brushed his fingertips along the shaft of Magnus’ hard cock, mouth going dry when the warlock shuddered and tilted his hips for more attention. They’d fooled around more than once but he always felt like a novice when it came to touching Magnus…not that he had ever complained. But then again he would have been just okay with kissing.

In the end just as the water began to cool Alec wrapped his wet hand around Magnus’ dick and jerked him off; his left hand gripping the side of the tub tightly as Magnus whispered filthy things into his ear. Directed him and told him how good he was making him feel while writhing in his lap. While gasping into the hollow of his throat and licking at his runes. When he came he groaned loudly and a few of the candles melted down to nothing in a matter of seconds. Alec watched it all with his lips parted and his hand still working, pulling all the pleasure that he could out of his boyfriend. He remembered their first time on the roof vividly and blushed even now when thinking about Magnus coming across his chest like that. How he’d silently begged for it.

As Magnus slumped forward with hooded eyes, Alec fumbled to get a hand around his own erection. He was straining amongst the bubbles and throbbing. That coupled with his exhaustion made him want to come _right the fuck now_. He whimpered in frustration when Magnus grabbed his wrist and refused to let go. “Magnus, please. I—I need—”

“Hey.” Magnus dragged his tongue across his bottom lip. “I know. Let me get you there.”

He didn’t have to ask twice.


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

After watching several variations of a movie called _Friday the 13th_ in which Alec still didn’t understand why they didn’t just chop Jason’s head off—he was _clearly_ a demon—he let Magnus pin him down onto the sofa and settle on top of him for some leisurely making out. They’d spent most of the day simply lounging around like bums in their pajamas ordering take out and watching DVDs. Magnus had not in fact left to get his mail and he ignored all of the phone calls that came his way. It was like nothing else existed in the world but them and well, the Chairman of course but he was just as lazy as they were. Perhaps more.

The only call that Alec had taken had been from his sister and while wild horses couldn’t have dragged him from Magnus’ loft, he still wanted to be kept up to date with Shadowhunter business. Apparently something very severe had happened to Simon because he’d drunk Jace’s blood…as in now he could walk in the sunlight. Alec decided not to ask how that revelation came about but it made him wonder why the vampires that fed on _him_ weren’t also now Daywalkers. Was his blood somehow _less_ special than Jace’s? Did it have something to do with family lines or was it simply because Simon was recently turned and all of them had been years if not decades old? Isabelle theorized it was because Simon was young and healthy unlike those poor creatures, obviously suffering from some ailment.

In any case he was happy they hadn’t gained that particular power. Would have made them much harder to kill if they could blend in during the day time.

One of the _Halloween_ movies was currently playing but neither of them were paying any attention. Alec had been stripped down to his boxer-briefs, his wrists held down above his head with the help of magic. It was a little unnerving because of what had happened to him with the vampires but he trusted Magnus implicitly and knew he only needed to utter his desire to stop and they would. The other part of him was enjoying it; the part that arched to Magnus’ soft lips and squirmed when fingertips tickled his ribs. Magnus was currently just teasing him and kissing his silvery scars. Tracing his runes with a quick tongue and biting his nipples until they were bruised red.

It was the best way to get Alec out of his head—getting him to focus or barely focus on something instead. He tried not to think about his conversation with Magnus the previous night but over thinking stuff was kind of his thing. And he would be lying if he said he wasn’t insecure about what something like that could do to his relationship. As it was being with Magnus was just as important as saving the world from monsters. To think he could save his sister’s life and nearly let his boyfriend die, and that everything would be okay seemed like madness to him. If Clary had saved Simon over Jace he would have brooded because of it for weeks. He didn’t know Simon very well but he had a feeling he’d do the same if the situation were reversed.

Yet Magnus wasn’t treating him any different. Maybe he was just super evolved or maybe he was used to being a second thought in those types of situations. Either way Alec wanted to make it up to him. He wanted to spend as long as it took showing him just how important he was. It occurred to him that perhaps he should be the one doing the kissing and worshipping but Magnus enjoyed being in charge so Alec let him. Truth be told not having to think about _what_ to do or _where_ to do it took a large weight off his shoulders. He was so steadfast and brave when it came to fighting. With Magnus he could be a bit more…submissive.

 _Submissive…_ He shivered and hid his face in the crook of his arm. Magnus noticed because Magnus tended to notice everything about him. “Okay?”

He nodded slowly. “Yeah I—I’m good.”

Magnus kissed the inside of his thigh. “Are you sure? What are you thinking?”

Biting his bottom lip, he curled his toes into the cushion. “You. This...moment. Other moments.”

Magnus tilted his head to the side. “What sort of _other moments_? Is there something you want me to do to you that I’m not doing?”

 _He shouldn’t be able to just_ ask _me that._ “Magnus…”

The warlock chuckled and crawled up until their faces were inches from each other. “You only have to ask, angel. I’ll give you whatever you want you know that.”

Alec did. He really did. “I—” Swallowing hard, he forced his eyes open. “I—I just wonder if maybe yo—you wished I was more here like I am in fights.”

Magnus arched a brow. “Well I don’t want you kicking me in the face if that is what you mean.”

Alec laughed. “No, no. I’ve just noticed that I tend to let you do all the…work.”

As he realized what the Shadowhunter was saying, Magnus grinned lazily and nosed at his neck. “I don’t mind. I like it to be honest. Besides I don’t consider this to be work. I love being able to make you feel good—it makes me feel good. And you always reciprocate so…” He kissed his chin. “Though did you bring it up because you want to go deeper?”

 _Gulp_. “How so?”

Magnus hooked his thumbs into Alec’s underwear and slowly dragged them down his strong legs, watching as his erection bounced free. “There is no manual…you can pretty much do whatever you are comfortable with. However if you’d like examples I’m partial to toys, begging and the occasional roughness. Nothing extreme; I don’t like pain or serious marks.”

Blinking with wide blue eyes, Alec watched as he tossed his boxer-briefs to the floor. He had no idea how to reply to any of that though he was curious. What _kind of_ toys? Surely not like for a child. And what exactly was the occasional roughness? The only thing he knew about that was punching, kicking or slashing. “You’ll have to explain it to me sometime very soon.”

Snickering, Magnus smoothed his hand up Alec’s pale white leg, pushing the right one down to the floor. “Alright.” He shimmed out of his own clothing and pulled a blanket over them to hide them from the Chairmen’s prying eyes. “I’ll draw you a diagram as well.”

For the next however long Alec was lost to the feelings and sensations coursing through his veins. Magnus was a heavy yet comfortable weight on top of him, keeping his chest elevated so as not to aggravate it. As their bodies pressed close, Magnus shifted just so and slotted their cocks next to each other, his hips giving a slow sensuous roll that had Alec gasping. In no time at all they were straining against each other, trading deep greedy kisses and touching whatever part they could get their hands on. It got warm under the blanket making a light sheen of sweat break out across their stomachs and shoulders.

“Fuck.” Alec found himself clinging to Magnus; one hand knotted in his hair and the other curled into the dip of his lower back. He bent his left leg and planted his foot on the cushions so that he could buck up every time Magnus pushed down. It was heaven.

Maybe it was the friction or maybe it was the slick hand Magnus managed to wrap around them both to stroke quickly from root to tip. Honestly Alec wasn’t too sure but he just knew that minutes later he was coming, head snapping back and body surrendering completely as his hips jerked, warmth pulsing between them. It was dirty and messy and shouldn’t be hot but it was. Left him wet and stretched out; his damp stomach just what Magnus needed to slide his dick through until he was shuddering through his own orgasm, fingertips sparking blue and eyes clenched tightly closed.

Magnus’ arm gave out and he crashed in a tangle of limbs onto his boyfriend, yelping when it jostled his wound. “Ow.” A beat. “But so worth it.”

The Shadowhunter snorted. “I feel filthy. We’re gonna stick together.”

“I’d clean us up but my mind is scattered so I might accidentally conjure something.” Magnus teased. “Unless you think a come licking demon would be appropriate?”

Alec swatted at him ineffectually. “Never say that again. Ugh.”

He always felt so much better after an orgasm. Even the small ones were better than nothing at all. He wanted to just dissolve into the cushions but he knew that wasn’t possible. So instead he left himself go limp and grinned as Magnus covered him with his body and snuggled close, shifting towards the back of the couch so that he didn’t tip into the floor. He brought a hand up and entangled their fingers together, idly wondering what shade of nail polish Magnus called the blue on his nails.

He found himself feeling very introspective and open, not flinching when his mind drifted back to the night before. There was still an angry sore bruise on Magnus’ chest and shadows under his eyes but he was okay. Perhaps it had been luck though if that was the case their luck could run out at any minute. There was still so much they had to do. So much he wanted to experience with Magnus only. He’d thought because of his immortality they had all the time in the world, granted Shadowhunter business didn’t prove too powerful for him. But Magnus was _immortal_ , not invincible.

With that in mind it just seemed silly to put things off for whatever reason or another.

“Magnus…” He began softly. “You—you almost died.”

The warlock kissed his ear. “I did…but then I got better.”

“And you have no idea how happy I am about that.” Alec shifted a little so that he could face him better. “But it also got me to thinking about us and our relationship.”

“Oh?” Magnus inquired warily. “You know Alec I was finding myself in danger before you came along. Actually I have a long history of it off and on throughout the year so—so if you’re blaming yourself you shouldn’t. I won’t exactly be any safer with you not in my life.”

“What? Oh, oh no! I—no I don’t want to break up!” Alec exclaimed. “It’s just—if you had died I would have always thought about what could have been. Like years from now where we’d be or whatever. It reminded me that time is precious and that we should make use of every moment.” Wetting his lips, he cupped Magnus’ cheek. “I don’t wanna _wait_ anymore. We shouldn’t waste any of the time we have together.”

“Angel.” Magnus kissed his fingertips one by one. “Are you saying you’re ready to have sex?”

 _Was he saying that?_ “I am. I realize we—that we haven’t said stuff we probably should but I also know it’s something I’ll never regret. I know I want you to be my first.”

Magnus stared at him thoughtfully for what seemed like forever, his eyes back to their nearly black state but calm and calculating. The wheels in his head were turning but his expression was serenely blank, his thumb tapping a secret rhythm on Alec’s stomach. And then he was leaning forward and kissing Alec, drawing a shuddery moan out of him as he explored his mouth languidly with his tongue. As with most of Magnus’ kisses Alec found his skin flushing up and his cock giving a valiant twitch, almost ready to fill again thanks to the _Stamina_ rune. He jerked his own hand down under the knit blanket and gave himself a squeeze, gasping as pleasure exploded behind his eyes.

There was a light chuckle against his lips and then Magnus was pulling back, smiling like the cat that got the canary as Alec tried to chase him. “Was that a yes?” he asked breathlessly.

The warlock smirked. “Yes.” He ran his fingers through Alec’s silky hair, making his lashes flutter. “My…affection for you has grown faster than I expected it would. Because of that there isn’t much that I would deny you. However you’re right. We could all die tomorrow in a fiery meteor explosion so we should make the best of all of our time together. And I do want to share this with you.” He nibbled at the spot under Alec’s ear that made him shiver. “Make love to you.”

Alec sighed happily and immediately reached for him, trying to pull him closer. “Now? Can we do it now?”

Magnus laughed, the sound rising up from his stomach. “God you’re so impatient. As sexy as it would undoubtedly be I’m not taking you on my sofa. Not for your first time. It’s supposed to be special after a night of special things.”

Pouting, Alec rubbed against him, smiling when Magnus growled and bit his earlobe. “Tonight? Can we do it tonight then?”

“Well…”

“Please? Surely you can plan a special evening in about four hours. You _do_ plan such amazing parties…”

“Heh first you’re a little shit. Second of course I could plan a totally special evening in four hours. I could plan it in one if I had to.”

“So then I can go back to the _Institute_ and make sure Simon hasn’t eaten everyone. Check to see if Idris has gotten back to us and then return for whatever you have planned.”

Shaking his head, Magnus relented. “Fine.”

Grinning so widely that his cheeks ached, Alec grabbed him and kissed him hard. “Good.” And then he was wiggling off the couch and jogging into the bathroom to clean up. “I’m excited. Is it weird to be excited?”

“No. I’d be worried if you weren’t.” Magnus called to him. “Though I hope you don’t think about it too much and stress yourself out.”

 _That does sound like me._ “I’ll throw myself into work until it’s time to come back here so that I can’t do that.” Wetting a soft cloth, he rubbed the dried semen off his skin and then returned to the living room, handing it to Magnus so that he could do the same. “So I should return about eight?”

Magnus now sitting up with his hair going every which way, took the rag and nodded. “Yeah that sounds good.”

Shrugging on his clothes, Alec slipped on his boots and tried not to bounce on his feet. Because that would have been stupid and he already felt so out of his depth with most things involving Magnus. But he was happy and he was sort of scared it would burst out of his chest. Tonight was going to be huge for him; a milestone that Isabelle and Jace had already experienced. Not that he wanted to have sex simply because they had. He just…it was _Magnus_. He wanted every part of Magnus that he could have.

Pushing strands of dark hair behind his ear, he smiled. “Okay so I’ll be back about eight o’clock.”

The warlock—gloriously naked with not a hint of shame—stood and pulled him into a hug. “I’ll be here. Try not to get too worked up until then.”

“Yeah yeah.” Alec blushed and tilted his face up for a kiss which he received. “See you tonight.” Yanking his hoodie on, he gave a rather shy wave and headed for the door.

His stomach was filled with so many butterflies it was a wonder they didn’t make him fly away. And even though a part of him was sort of nervous it was a small part—the part that still resided in the closet for the people in his life that would be devastated to learn he was gay. One day that voice wouldn’t exist but for tonight he was going to ignore it entirely and do what he wanted to do. And as sappy as it sounded he wanted to be with Magnus.

_It just sucks that I won’t be able to talk about it afterwards like Jace always did with his conquests. I mean I suppose I could to Clary but that’s not really our relationship. And while Isabelle would listen she’s my sister and I doubt she wants to think of her brother having sex. I guess I’ll just have to wait until there are no more secrets._

_That could be very soon if you just manned up._

Frowning, he pushed those thoughts away and took the stairs two at a time until he was strolling through the dimly lit foyer and out the heavy front door, thanks to the doorman who looked perpetually bored. Truthfully Alec didn’t know why the building even _needed_ a doorman since he wasn’t certain anyone else lived there, but it was extravagant and Magnus liked that from time to time. There was a serious chance he wasn’t even real; just some type of magical projection capable of touching corporeal things.

Outside was chilly and crisp from a gloomy gray sky so Alec zipped up his hoodie and inhaled deeply. He turned and glanced up towards the penthouse with a little smile, shrinking in on himself as people walked past him. He dug into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out the ring Magnus had given him, brushing it back and forth across his bottom lip. He wished he could wear it but he was liable to lose a finger because of it while fighting. Perhaps on a chain?

Slipping it on for a moment, he admired the weight of it and scuffed his feet to head towards the _Institute_ when suddenly there was a pretty girl with bright pink hair in pigtails stepping in front of him.

“Alec Lightwood?” She questioned. “Are you Alec Lightwood?”

He blinked cursing himself for not hiding from the mundanes. However since she was a mundane he wondered how she could possibly know him? Was Simon telling secrets? That sort of thing could get him killed. “Um, yeah. Do I know you?”

She shrugged. “I’m Kara. We have a mutual acquaintance in common.” She cleared her throat. “First I want you to know this is nothing personal. You seem like an okay guy but…I really wanna stay young and hot forever.”

Before he could reply something sharp jabbed him in the back and a pain quick as lightening shot up his spine, causing all of his nerves to scream as if stripped raw. It was so intense that it triggered a seizure like shaking in his limbs, knocking him backwards and off legs that refused to move. Whoever was behind him caught him as he fell and slipped a black sack over his head, blocking out the daylight. He tried to struggle but his arms were like jelly, his fingers curled into tight useless fists. He opened his mouth to scream and was shocked again, this time in the neck. The dizziness and disorientation leapt on him; pulled him down so deep that when his eyes closed they didn’t open again for quite a while.

*

There were voices murmuring around him. None that he could pick out so strangers speaking softly with one another and laughing merrily without a care in the world. He opened his mouth to speak and ended up coughing, his throat feeling like someone had poured gravel down it. At the first sign that he was awake the murmuring stopped and he forced his eyes to open. Tried to move but realized his arms were chained above his head causing him to make a Y formation. He shivered from the cold and realized it was because he wasn’t wearing a shirt or shoes.

Licking his lips, Alec shook away the fuzzy images in front of him and swallowed hard so that he didn’t vomit from the rolling on his stomach. There were ten people in the room including the pink haired Kara loitering near sweeping red curtains. And perched on a fancy chaise in a sparkling white gown was one Camille Belcourt.

She smiled at him, showing off her pointed fangs. “Hello Alexander. Let’s talk.”

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. ;)


End file.
